I used to always think that I would never need a 'shrink', as society puts it so stereotypically. I thought Therapists were for people who were crazy and needy. I was too quick to judge. My thinking couldn't have been more wrong. Life will always throw you curve-balls and you're bound to fall down sometime. It is true that life is 90% of how you react to situations. But the flaw in this saying is that it is suggesting that you should always be happy. That is not the reality of the world. No one can be happy ALL the time. Yes, we should do our very best to keep our heads up but in this life, it is often necessary that you go through sorrow and pain because it is the only way you can grow and learn. Why is there sorrow and pain in life? How can a loving God put us through this? These questions have been asked since the dawn of mankind. The answer to me is quite simple and I accept it. We live in a fallen and depraved world. It has been tainted and marred by sin. God hates to see us go through pain but He knows it is necessary if we are to survive in this world. He has the power to stop all the suffering but.... we are sinful and it is part of our punishment. He offers us a way out through His son Jesus Christ and that is how much he loves us. No sin can exist in the presence of God. Now a lot of people will say 'hey, I'm not that bad. I'm better than that guy over there'. Well let me ask you this: have you ever lied? Have you ever looked at a woman or man and had lustful thoughts? Have you ever stolen anything, even if it was something little? My guess is you said yes to most of these. Then by definition, you are a lying thief and an adulterer at heart. Now yes, this may seem very accusatory but don't you think it's wrong? A lot of people reject Christ because they think that once they accept him, that there will be too many rules to follow. This is not true. Accepting Christ gives you freedom from the condemnation of the law (ten commandments) and He will testify on your behalf. Will you still sin? yes of course but the amazing thing is that Jesus will forgive you every single time. That is grace. You cannot get into heaven by your own deeds. It is given freely as a gift by Jesus Christ and this keeps any man from boasting of his own works because they ultimately count for nothing.
There will be pain in this life and everyone is looking out to be number one. They reject Christ because they want to be their own God. Rejection of God is the source of all suffering. I learned this the hard way. There's a saying that the only thing we really have control over is our own lives and what we do with it. Trying to control everything in my life has led me to despair and I almost gave up on life multiple times. If you go down the path of trying to control your life and not letting anyone in then that is a sure way to self destruction. There are some hurts so deep that you need help to truly heal. I grew tired of trying to control my life so I finally let Jesus take control of my life because he knows what's best for me. And truly, it is a load off of my mind because when you control your life, you carry the burden of worry and anxiety. You can't control things that happen to you. God will lead you and direct your path.
Now you may be astounded to hear this, but I think it was a good thing that I became suicidal. Sometimes, a person is only willing to change once they have gone through an enormous amount of pain. When I was at that point, with a knife pressing against my chest and tears streaming down my face, I declared to God that I'm done trying to control my life because truly, I can't control it. That's when I realized that God should be in control because I can't do better. I failed. Therapy definitely helps you see things from a different perspective but I came to that conclusion on my own. It did take lots of therapy to course-correct my train of thought that was always on suicide. I've said before that everyone could use a therapist because everyone's at least a little crazy. I still stand by what I said. I believe that nobody gets by in life without some emotional scars. I used to have a very negative and callous attitude about the mind and psychology. I thought that anyone who complained about emotional pain were babies. God has truly humbled me and I honestly will do anything I can to help alleviate other people's emotional pain. It's amazing how the world itself remains the same while your mind can put you through hell. You don't truly know what people go through until you go through a similar experience yourself.
No comments:
Post a Comment